things kevin hates

I know you might not guess it from the title of this blog and from my usually introverted personality, but I think of myself as a nice guy. And while I’m no extrovert, I love throwing a party. Actually, to be more specific, I love it when my parents throw a party and I get to take the credit.

I always strive to be pretty inclusive; if I’m having a cast party for a play I’m not going to hide the party’s existence from anyone in the cast or crew. For my Tony parties, there’s nothing I love more than seeing a huge, diverse group of theatre people; some of them I’ve just worked with, others I may not have worked with in years. Some people prefer small groups of their best friends, but not me. The more, the merrier, in my opinion. So I invite tons and tons of people.

Hospitality, however, goes both ways, and I find it frustrating when hospitality is not reciprocated. First of all, I consider it a faux pas when people show up at a party (my place or elsewhere) and don’t bring anything. I realize sometimes this isn’t practical—you go to a late night cast party when grocery stores are already closed, you find out about a party at the last minute, and so forth—but in general, it’s almost always possible to bring something. It need not be expensive—even a bag of potato chips will do—but you gotta bring something. Didn’t your momma raise you better than that? I don’t know if people are lazy or poor or just ignorant, but if it’s the third, then I’m here to fix it. And if it’s one of the first two, I think I’ve shown that those shouldn’t be obstacles.

Second of all, I find it rather frustrating when people who are close enough friends to come to parties at my house can’t be bothered to reciprocate with an invitation of their own. I realize some people live in tiny houses or apartments or just aren’t much for throwing parties. But surely there are ways of reaching out, aren’t there? Think about this when anyone shows you hospitality—find a way to reciprocate in some manner. It’s downright insulting and hurtful when I go out of my way to include people only to see others not show the same concern. And I’m sure I’m not the only person who feels this way.