things kevin hates

First of all, let me admit that I’m a casual, bandwagon Hornets fan. When I was a kid, my favorite team was the Orlando Magic (because of Shaq), and after he went from Orlando to Los Angeles most of my interest in the NBA faded. Sure, I’d watch a game here or there, but I mostly preferred the college game. So much of the NBA play was dominated by isolation plays for the stars, as opposed to the ball movement of the college game. The refs let stars get away with traveling and carrying. The 24-second play clock led to an uninteresting, back-and-forth style of play, and outlawing zones struck me as taking away a big part of the game. I remembered when I was little and we almost nabbed the Timberwolves; the Times-Picayune even ran a headline that said “Got ‘em!” above a Timberwolves jersey. This was pretty exciting, aside from the minor detail that we did not, in fact, get the Timberwolves.

When the Hornets came, I wasn’t all that excited at first. I’d watch the occasional game on TV, but didn’t pay too much attention. Then in 2003 I moved to a new house and got DirecTV, which didn’t have (and still doesn’t have) Cox Sports TV, so I couldn’t watch Hornets games aside from the occasional nationally televised game. But then the Hornets got Chris Paul and returned to New Orleans full-time after a Katrina-induced exile to Oklahoma City. And they started winning. I had to been to a Hornets game once before (2004, maybe?) when my dad got some tickets from a work colleague. But I didn’t go again until I decided to go in March 2008, when the red-hot Hornets were fighting for the #1 spot in the Western Conference. They were playing the Bulls and entered the 4th quarter down by nine, but came back to win by eleven. Chris Paul had 37 points and 13 assists. I didn’t start attending every home game or anything like that, but clearly the NBA and the Hornets had some appeal.

They had enough appeal that I bought a ticket for the first game of their playoff series against the Spurs that year. I paid something like $55 for a seat in the lower bowl behind the basket. A little bit steep, but nothing too bad for a game every once in a while. This was, as you may recall, the game in which the Hornets’ mascot jumped through a ring of fire. Unfortunately, the fire was difficult to extinguish, and the contents of the various fire extinguishers ended up all over the arena floor, leading to a lengthy delay. In any case, the Hornets won that game, but ended up losing the series 4-3 to San Antonio. When the season was over, I was disappointed, mostly because it had been a lot of fun to turn on the TV and watch Chris Paul play. There were the alley-oops to Tyson Chandler, the dribble-drives and lay-ups through a forest of much taller players, the behind-the-back dribbles; CP3 plays in a way that is not only effective but also aesthetically delightful. I wasn’t distraught in the way I would be after the end of an unsuccessful Saints season; Hornets basketball wasn’t and isn’t a matter of life and death for me, but when they’re playing well it’s a fun diversion.

Of course, I’d been able to watch those playoff games because they were on TNT or ESPN or ABC. Once the Hornets resumed play in the fall of 2008, I was out of luck once again. There was no way I was giving up DirecTV, but it sure was frustrating that I couldn’t watch the Hornets. Now, it’s not quite as upsetting right now since CP3 is still out with an injury and the Hornets are on the outside of the playoffs looking in, but it’s inexplicable that Cox and DirecTV can’t work out a deal. At first I figured Cox wanted to keep its cable channel away from satellite companies and rival cable operators, but they agreed on a deal with Dish Network. Presumably it’s a matter of money, and surely if they were asked Cox would blame DirecTV and DirecTV would blame Cox, but who’s the real loser here? The devout fans will switch to Cox or Dish just for the Hornets, so they’re inconvenienced, but they’re not missing out. The casual fan (people like me) will get on with their lives.

The real loser? The Hornets. They’re struggling a bit, but they have a really great product. Chris Paul may be sidelined, but backup point guard Darren Collison has been having a stellar rookie season. His fellow rookie, Marcus Thornton (the former LSU standout), has been scoring points in bunches of late. Peja may be old and overpaid, but he can still go on 3-point barrages with surprising frequency. And there’s David West, the power forward with a stellar midrange game. It’s a fun team to watch, and the Hornets have managed to dump salary without ruining their team, a pretty good accomplishment in today’s NBA. But I wouldn’t have known they were any good had I not gone to a game or caught the occasional nationally televised one. But a casual fan with DirecTV—and I see plenty of dishes throughout the city and metro area—isn’t going to see any Hornets games, and isn’t going to realize how much fun the team is to watch and how entertaining the games are in person.

And off the court, the Hornets do a great job. Bands play outside the arena before games, with $1 beers and cheap hot dogs for sale. During the game there are acrobatic slam dunks off trampolines, bizarre halftime entertainment (contortionists, escape artists, plate spinners, you name it), a plethora of dance teams (with everyone from little kids to old ladies), t-shirt cannons and slingshots, free programs, and so on. It’s so different from a Saints game; the Saints know how football-crazed we are, and that we’re gonna show up know matter what. The Hornets actually have to work for an audience, and it shows. There’s enough going on at a Hornets game to draw in a casual fan—or even someone who doesn’t care for basketball at all. On the other hand, attending an NFL game would three hours of boredom and torture for those perverse souls who don’t enjoy football. (Supposedly these people exist, although in New Orleans they’ve gone into hiding. I don’t understand them at all, but apparently they exist.) But you could hate basketball (or at least know nothing about it) and enjoy a Hornets game.

Now, before I finish I guess I should address the argument that if people can see the Hornets on TV, why would they go to the games? (There’s no blackout rule like in the NFL.) Well, anecdotally speaking, I don’t have the Hornets on TV and I don’t go to all that many games; I’ve been to two so far this year, and I’ll try to go to one or two more once CP3 is playing again. So not being able to watch the Hornets isn’t driving me to the New Orleans Arena every single night. I think the benefit of free advertising outweighs the drawback of a freely available televised product, which means that the Hornets should be more involved in forcing DirecTV and Cox to reach an agreement. Obviously, the Hornets aren’t directly involved, but they have a lot to gain. And yes, I understand that it’s a business, and apparently DirecTV and Cox aren’t really interested, but it’s a bit ridiculous that they haven’t worked something out.