From the day after Thanksgiving through the 12 Days of Christmas, I’m pretty much a total Christmas music junkie. That includes spending a lot of time listening to the local all-Christmas music station. I’m not usually a fan of the modern, sappy stuff; give me a centuries-old carol or at least a 40s or 50s standard. But one tear-jerking song is so deliciously terrible that a shiver of excitement runs down my spine every time it comes on the radio. I speak, of course, of “The Christmas Shoes.” If for some reason you haven’t heard it yet, please check out the music video of it on youtube and have a good laugh before reading my dissection of it. (That video features scenes from a TV movie adapted from the song.)
First, some background courtesy of Wikipedia. The song was based on an Internet rumor which was brought to the attention of a member of the Christian music group NewSong. Now, I don’t know who this group is, but Wikipedia’s page on them says that they are notable for their charity work for underprivileged children. I have no reason to doubt that the members of NewSong are fine, upstanding members of their communities who do many good things, and I applaud them for that, but does that excuse coming out with the worst Christmas song ever? You decide. And to help you make that decision, I’ve prepared a detailed explanation of just how laughably terrible this song is. Click here to read it!