things kevin hates

[edit]–I keep getting google hits for “last night’s Glee episode” and I don’t want to confuse anyone. So know that this is about “Wheels,” which aired November 11, 2009, and not about any future episode that may be “last night’s Glee episode” at any particular point in time. But while you’re here, check out my post about Glee’s ridiculous amount of Auto-Tune usage.

Let me start right off by saying that I’m a huge fan of Glee. I start with a positive disposition to any sort of movie or TV musical, and I was hooked on Glee from the pilot, not only for the musical sequences but also for the outstanding ensemble of character actors and actresses, the cameos by Broadway superstars, and the bitingly sharp writing. The first few episodes of Glee have shown that it’s willing to mock Christians, cheerleaders, people with lisps, homosexuals, blacks, football players, mysophobes, and plenty of others. There were the occasional sensitive moments—Kurt coming out to his dad, Will learning from his wife that they’re going to have a baby, Ken’s longing for Emma despite the fact that she’s hopelessly in love with Will, etc. But last night’s episode (“Wheels” is the episode title) went way off the deep end of maudlin sentimentalism with a veritable miscellany of topics fit for an after-school special or a very special episode.

We got treated to not one, not two, but three jolts of needlessly dramatic emotionalism. We’ve already seen Kurt come out to his friends and his dad, so I felt like that topic had been covered sufficiently. But when his dad gets a threatening phone call, he’s willing to flub an audition to keep from getting the solo he had so desperately wanted, admitting this to his dad in a scene that manages to make Kurt look like he’s bragging about how humble he is—willing to put aside his desire to be the diva to reduce his dad’s discomfort at being harassed for having a gay son. One could even make the argument that giving into this sort of homophobia is undesirable. Why should Kurt pass up the chance to sing “Defying Gravity”? Just because an anonymous prank caller is a homophobe? Just because his dad is clearly still struggling to come to grips with the extravagantly flamboyant homosexuality of his only son?

We also got bashed over the head with the “people in wheelchairs have feelings too” message. Up to now Artie had been mocked occasionally (for example, when Sue was dividing up the Glee club and calling everybody by their stereotypes), but he seemed to fit in with the rest of the club pretty well. When the school doesn’t have the money for a handicapped-accessible bus to sectionals, the rest of the team seems pretty happy to throw Artie under the metaphorical bus and make him ride with his dad while the rest of the glee club gets to share a fun bus ride. First of all, I question the fact that no one on the club would have stood up for him. Sure, there’s a few divisions, and nobody except Finn likes Rachel, but everyone seemed to like Artie. Second, what sort of douchebag would reject a girl because her stutter was fake? WTF? It’s bad to discriminate against people who are “different,” but okay to reject people who are “normal”? Double standards, much? It’s like those deaf people who have deaf kids and then get offended when someone suggests that they treat their kids’ deafness with cochlear implants. Yeah, don’t give your kids a chance to enjoy music or anything like that. Great call.

Finally, we got a seemingly bizarre moment of kindness from the delightfully diabolical Sue Sylvester, who, when forced by the principal to have open tryouts for Quinn’s spot on the Cheerios, puts a Down’s syndrome student on the squad. Will is confused and certain that Sue has something nefarious in mind, but then we cut to a scene with Sue at a nursing home visiting…her Down’s syndrome older sister. A fascinating window into the softer side of Sue, to be sure, but piled onto the others it was just too much.

Any of these three things might have been nice had they been the sole dramatic subplot in an otherwise funny episode—for example, having all the glee clubbers get around in wheelchairs was a great bit of writing. But piling them up dragged down a bright, uplifting, yet satirical show, turning it into just another after-school special. As I said in a facebook status last night, if I wanted to watch a second-rate after school special I’d watch Degrassi.*

* In case you didn’t already know, I’m pretty much obsessed with Degrassi. I love that show way more than any twenty-something heterosexual male should. But it does have a tendency to get a little shark-jumpingly preachy every now and then. And it also has a tendency to reuse plotlines—I knew when we got to Jimmy’s erectile dysfunction episode we had used just about every possible plotline. Come to think of it, Degrassi has had a guy in a wheelchair (Jimmy), homosexuals and bisexuals (Marco, Dylan, Alex, Paige, etc.), and the mentally disabled (Emma’s dad, who was left brain-damaged after an acid-trip led to either falling or jumping off a bridge). You can’t beat Degrassi in a very-special-episode contest, so don’t even bother trying, Glee.